Theo Fleury is the Michael Jordan of hockey.

Little Theo, (Tip: don't call him that when he's been drinking), has a new plan that may or may not include a Substance Abuse and Behavioral Health Program. He is going to play baseball. Fleury is planning on suiting up for the Calgary Vipers of the Northern Baseball League this weekend, against the Yuma Scorpions. Quick question, where the fuck is Yuma? Another quick question, what the fuck is the Northern Baseball League?

Sooo, based on his previous experiences with semi-pro leagues I have never heard of, this should go about as smoothly as a bear in a honey tree. But in this case the bear is a tiny alcoholic ex-hockey player, and the honey is most likely an innocent bystander that was given free tickets to a "baseball game". I hope that poor bastard has medical. Play Ball!

Oh, and one more thing, the Northern League has an Edmonton franchise named the Cracker Cats. I just imagine the logo being the side profile of a white guy, a la Blackhawks.

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