Bottom 5 trades of the NHL fiscal year

Part two of the analysis of this year's trades. You could say "Hey, wouldn't the worst trades be the other end of the best ones?" No. They wouldn't be. Stop being an ignoramus.

HEEEEEEEERE WE GO!

5. Matt Carle/Dan Frtische (pick a trade)

Analysis: I really hope one of these two gets the hat-trick before the deadline.


4.The Phoenix Coyotes acquired center Olli Jokinen from the Florida Panthers for defensemen Keith Ballard and Nick Boynton as well as a second-round draft pick in 2008

Analysis: You can spell the word Joke in his last name. Fitting. The paycheque is the big hurt in this one.

3.The Dallas Stars acquired defenseman Darryl Sydor from the Pittsburgh Penguins for defenseman Philippe Boucher.

Analysis: This trade blows because of the pure wash of it all. Why would I trade naked pictures of Williams' grandma for naked pictures of Towers' grandma?

2.The Atlanta Thrashers acquired defenseman Mathieu Schneider from the Anaheim Ducks for defenseman Ken Klee and wingers Brad Larsen and Chain Painchaud.

Analysis: Schneider's point totals in the ATL were poop. Does Burke still owe them a favor for this deal even though he is with Toronto now? Also, who names their kid Chain when his last name is "Hot-bread"?

1.The Tampa Bay Lightning acquired defenseman Andrej Meszaros from the Ottawa Senators for defensemen Filip Kuba and Alexandre Picard, plus a first-round draft pick in 2009.

Analysis: FUCKING OWNED! Man Tampa is amazing...

Thrashers slightly less shitty.

If you are Atlanta, why would you deal for a good player? You see, in my mind, adding Matty Schneider makes the Trashers better. So whats the problem? Well, he doesn't make them that much better. He isn't going to turn the arguably worst team in the NHL into a playoff contender, but it could turn a Tavares pick into a Toni Rajala pick. And that is the same difference between picking Sidney Crosby and Jack Skille. How about this for an idea Atlanta. Just sit back, relax, let Kovalchuk dazzle your fan for 5 months, then ride the draft wave into 2010. Also, if you don't do this, Toronto will, and we can't afford to let those guys have anything. Why? Fuck you, that's why.

Also, why is a player that is supposedly that good on his 8th team? Whats up with that?

Brian Burke's Head Finds a Home

Apparently the only thing bigger than Mr. Burke's head is his own anal cavity.

Today he put Mathieu Schneider on waivers. Huh? A top offensive D-man can't even get traded for a low draft pick? My theory is this: When Burke didn't like the "low-ball" offers he simply decided to screw over some teams by putting him on the waiver wire.

AND, this is the second time in less than a year that he's done this. Remember how the Coyotes got their hands on Bryzgalov last year? It was from the Ducks, off of waivers.

Note to Mr. Burke: eat your ego for breakfast, 'cause when you have 2 top players under contract and you get nothing for them people may start to ask questions (and the answers could be painful if they're located up your ass).

PS - I really hope he's kept a diary on these moves like he did a couple of years ago. I like Burke as a show-boatin' media whore but his GM'ing is a little suspect - right, Mr. Lowe?