Hejduk is a newborn baby.

NHL Star, and human band-aid, Milan Hejduk told some bong-bong language website that he is planning on retiring from hockey at the end of his current contract with the Colorado Avalanche. His knee has apparently taken on the consistency of warm butter, and it "hurts to be alive". MIlan has 2 years / 8Mil left on his current contract.

So long Hedge Duck, don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

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