Proud Fathers across the nation unite.

Can you skate?

Can you use a shovel?

Are you a slut?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, you too can be a National Hockey League Ice Girl! Imagine wearing spandex leggings and a low-cut top in front of 18,000 drunk idiots, all while doing manual labor! And that's not all, you also get minimum wage! What a wonderful society we live in! Sign up today!

In all seriousness though, I would ruin some of these chicks. Except the one standing behind number 105 at the top there. Someone needs to tell that dumpy bitch to go home.

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