Half awake and apparently gay. The Davey Williams story.
So over the course of the existence of this fine upstanding young blog, I (and the other jerk-offs that write for the Dump) have made no bones about our love affair with Alexander Ovechkin. He is everything good about the NEW NHL. One could make an argument that I may even want to give him a heterosexual blow job, but that is merely here say, and I can't legally attest to that (even if he is practically begging for it). Anyways, my blatant homosexuality aside, I wanted to make a quick little comment to AO's head coach Mr. Boudreau. Fuck you.
But why? Why would I tell that sweet, fat little man to fuck off? Well, you see, he is ruining everything. When Alex scored his 50th the other night, he also opened up a door that has been begging to opened for years in the NHL. That door of course being the planned NFL style celebrations. They are amazing. I know some people will tell you that they don't belong in the game, but you have to remember that those people are pieces of no fun shit, and should die. Which brings me back to Brucie. Brucie had a little talk with our hero after his celebration and quote... "I won't say what we talked about, but we talked. It's the first and only time I've seen that happen in all the time I've been watching Alex. I've never seen him do a celebration like that. But I don't expect it to happen again."
Thanks for that. We finally get a guy with both talent and personality and it gets wiped out immediately. Does the NHL even have a marketing division? Or is it just Bettman and his bald friends? I picture a door in an office in new york that reads NHL Marketing and Media Relations, and when you open it it's just a chair with a chicken standing on it.
So basically I'm tired of typing and I lost my train of thought, so I will sum it all up with this...
OVECHKIN = My wife leaving me.
Boudreau = Smells worse than my nuts.
Marketing = Goes well with waffles.
This blog = Downhill fast.