Sean Avery is a scholastic, gentlemanly, pig-pusher.

Way to go Sean. Way to push that fucking pig that showed up to your door trying to shut down your party. You fucking show him who's boss!

This is all hear-say and circumcismal, but there are reports that Sean Avery, Lady Byng hopeful, may have had some sort of fracas-invlovement with officers of the law that were attempting to reel in a get-together at a venue of his choosing.

Who the fuck do these pigs think they are, anyways? It's THE SEAN AVERY FUCKING WINE MIXER!

Avery would most likely be risking a bit of his stake at future NHL viability. His response? "It'll all work out at some point". I guess I would feel confident that my career and future were in good hands, especially if I handed my legal troubles over to the career-saving lawyer in charge of Mel Gibson's and Lindsay Lohan's law run-ins.

Bravo Sean. Maybe you can Haute-Couture the shit outta the pen you go to. Not to be confused with the pen that "fat little pigs" live in.

The most amazing of all this? If you google Sean Avery under News, he is trumped by some name-saked mare that placed 1st at VAderbilt [assumes this is an improtant horse race]. AT least someone is #winning.