The Slowest Three Minutes In Hockey

Dunce starts us off tonight, with a quick piss and moan about how Kovalev got a penalty for being the second Hab ejected during a face-off. He lets us know how rules are "insane". Then, to prove that he knows what he is talking about, he puts on a caveman/Tarzan-esque voice, evidently to show us how linesman talk. It's ironic that he is the one who sounds like a caveman, voice mask non-withstanding.

Then het gets mad because Justin Pogge stepped on some Bruins' skate and fell down. Don would have us beleive that the goal should not have counted, as there should have obviously been a penalty. Never mind that the Bruins player was being ridden into the crease by a Leaf. And never mind that Pogge was up in time to make the save but just gave up. I'm not sure what's more pathetic, the fact that Don is still updating us with Leafs' info, or the fact that I am passing it on second hand.

So finally we ge to to Ovechkin, and the Coach's Corner RESPECT t-shirt. Cherry totally fucks my post at this point. He praises Ovechkin and infers that he is an ok guy. He even goes so far as to say he will win the Rocket Richard (not a bold statement were it from anyone else's mouth). Then he praises him for not "jumping around" after he scores and empty netter... Are you even serious? Like Ovechkin would do that? He also mentions that no one should ever jump around. Oh yeah? What about this:


Then Don lets us know that it IS ok for the Oilers team to jump around after Roloson's 51 save performance the other night...Fuck, I am almost as confused as Dunce was when Ron mentioned politics.

Small-town Canadians are also the best, according to the Dongler. The best at shoveling chikenshit.

What the Hull crawled up Modano's ass?

“It was idiotic and stupid,” Modano told the Dallas Morning News. “It was one of the most embarrassing things I’ve seen. If that’s what we’re going for, then they need to find me an office job.”

These were Modano's comments in response to a loss against the Bruins, in which the following transpired:



Some things I took from this video:

a)Steve Ott is sub-human.
b)Announcers who don't know much of anything can make up for it with references to Sean Avery being ripped limb from limb, especially if you infer that it would be weird not to want to see that happen.
c)Matty Niskanen is a pretty little boy.
d)Why is a pretty little boy fighting?
e)These teams should play more often.
f)I need an "I hate Peyton Manning" T-shirt.
g)It's been too long since I saw the Churla hit:



The various news sources where I read about Modano's comments , made it sound like they were directed solely @ Avery. I would guess Avery factors in, but Ott seems like the big fucking pussy here. I suppose when you put more than one guy on a team that won't back his shit up, old man Modano gets pissed off.

And thus it seems Hull managed to get his team an identity, something to the effect of the whiny yellow-belly shitdisturbers.

Side note: It pains me that Don Cherry worked his way into this post. I suppose vermin always turn up where you don't want them.

New thirds for Bruins & Canes

They are both black and boring. Ta-da.

Thirds & Turds.

We gots overselves some of them third jersey logos thanks to the good people (probably) at Icethetics. Wanna check 'em out? Follow me...


Here it appears that Wayne decided to give the coyote head a body. It's nice I guess, I would have opted for this instead.


And the good old boys in teh ATL have decided to do the Dallas thing. I would have just gone with this instead. I feel it has a certain, je ne sais quoi.


Looks like the bruins are taking a trip in the way back machine for this little piece of bread and butter. It's good, but not great.


We already saw these bad boys at the Winter Classic last season. So why is on this damn list? We might as well show a picture of Dan Hinote's wife nude.


The sharks are moving the arm patch to the crest. I for one think that something, something, more pics of Dan Hinote's wife nude.


The Lightning decided to go with something retarded.


And the Leafs.